Grooming & dealing with child tantrum is one of the biggest challenge for a Pakistani Mom.We have presented some techniques that can help Moms in handling their tantrum kid aka. “Zidi Bacha” 🙂
Kids are your biggest and most valuable assets. You treat them right they end up being a good human being but if you mess it all up or you lose control they will end up being a nightmare for you and the world to handle. Who doesn’t like well-behaved, organized and sophisticated kids? We all do and wish for!! But how to make your kids all of the above mentioned good character requires a great deal of patience and presence of mind. You are the adult in the end and you are responsible for what your kid is doing either good or bad to a certain age. You have to slowly and gradually tame your kid handle them wisely.
Childhood is fun and nasty at the same time. Kids want to have fun all the time. From very early childhood your kid is learning to control their moods. They are always experimenting and testing their parent’s patience all the time. They learn from their parents reactions they pick up hints as to when and when not to throw tantrum. They learn to control their parents and they are always trying hard to control or be on top of their parents. Counting all these thing parents are always under pressure and tested to stay calm and to respond to their offspring’s mood swings correctly. Mothers specially are the one whose reaction really matters in making a child behavior.
Mothers are the ones usually dealing with all the chores of house and at the same time they are dealing with their kids. Most of the common problem every mother faces is that the kids want to play with all their toys all the time which mean a lot of mess for a mother to tackle all the time. Kids will be kids and remember there are no ideal kids in the world. Every kid lacks somewhere.
Some kids are so well disciplined that they play with only one toy at a time but others want to want to make a mess. Another problem can be with your kids eating habits.
Some kids like to eat as much as they are given while others want to spit it out and take nothing literally nothing inside there tummy making it a hell for a mother to live in.
Some kids become so manipulative that they know where to throw their mood tantrums and where to stay disciplined and nice.
Some kids want to study as much as they are told to while others just want to play games and toys.
Some kids might want every toy in the store while others stay calm and ask for just one new toy. It’s up to the parents to tame their kids and show them the right path always and all the time there are no breaks in parenthood and no time outs for you as a parent.
Patience is the key to success for every parent. It’s a general rule every single parent should follow. If you lose control you will definitely break the kid down. You have to control your anger and learn when or when not to show your anger to your kid. You have to learn to show the right amount of anger you need to show to your kid. When you are an adult you have to decide when or when not to show anger to your kid.
We live in a society where parents are judged from their kid’s behavior. If the kid is not behaving means their parent has not tamed the child. The children are expected to behave in public and they should not have a voice of their own. We actually suppress our children from showing their pure reactions towards different things.
As this topic is a very lengthy one I will advise you to select the situation in which you are in and read about it
How to control your kid’s tantrum at the store:
Our society wants a well tamed kid having no voice at all after seeing a new toy in the market. A 3 year old or may be 2 year old is expected to behave nicely even after the parents are not buying them that new toy they just accidently saw in the store. They are expected not to cry for or beg for what they really want in public. All these things are a negative aspect of our society and somehow as a parent we do care about how our kid should behave in public for maintaining our good impression on someone whom we just saw. This is what makes us parents worry more over what we want for our children.
To avoid this type of situation you should negotiate from your children before getting into the market. You can give them the initiative that they will get an ice-cream if they behave nicely or maybe you can promise a certain toy if they behave nicely you can buy them that. Also you can ask them to behave nicely then they will go to their favorite place after shopping. By taking these measures you can avoid this tantrum from the very beginning.
It becomes very embarrassing for a parent to control your 1 – 3 year olds tantrum when in store because so many people are around and you have to act so wisely to save your kids self-esteem and your meltdown. I know you should never care about what everyone is thinking but still nobody is ideal. Everyone somehow does care for what people will say. If the tantrum somehow has started you can just take a timeout from shopping bring the kid to the car give them some chips or snack of their choice and let them and yourself cool down and then you can continue the shopping. When your kid is in good mood you should negotiate with him on something. This will distract them and prevent your meltdown as well.
How to handle a tantrum in front of public:
Whichever the situation is distraction technique will work for you always. If everyone is noticing you should take a chocolate out or your child’s favorite snack and give it to them instantly before the mood swing starts.
Follow these rules .they will help you prevent the mood swing in kids.
1.Give plenty of positive attention.
Give your child a lot of positive attention always don’t ignore them.
2.Take Steps to Prevent Tantrums
As a parent you know when your kid is about to melt down. Distract him or either take him out of the place before the whole scene starts.
3.The Louder She Yells, the Softer You Should Speak
Act politely to your children .if they are shouting you must not shout in return, rather stay calm and talk to them really politely.
4.Give a big hug
When you see increasing tantrum issues in your child give them a nice hug more often. This will satisfy them and reassure them that they are loved.
Your child might be hungry when they are in a bad mood. Offer them something to eat or drink.
6.Give Your Kid Incentive to Behave:
Offer them some incentive that if they behave the right way they will get an ice cream or their favorite food.
7.Get Out of There:
Prevent the whole scenario by walking out of that place for some time and when your kid is alright get back in.
8.Distract your child.
Distraction is the key in every situation. Don’t get stuck in one place rather take them someplace else or give them something to eat or give them some other distraction that you can think off.
9.Consider the request carefully when your child wants something.
Sometimes we as a parent are being very stuburn. Consider your kids request first before saying no.
After the Storm
After the mood swing give your kid a big hug and something to eat and laugh with him. Make him feel loved so that this tantrum may not impact on his personality development. Make him realize what he did wrong in the situation with love.